Tweets to My Younger Self

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Imagine if today's technology enabled you to reach back in time and tell you at a younger age the things you wish you'd known when you were living in the moment. The Next Avenue staff decided to use Twitter to send these messages in a bottle to our youth and ourselves.

WORK

• Working yourself to death is no way to live.
• Don’t tell HR anything about your boss in confidence. They’ll call him as soon as you leave the room.
• It’s 1982 and you’re making big money now, $22K. Time to open an IRA. Max out on your contributions.
• Don’t major in journalism — by Y2K it will no longer be a noble profession. Instead, open a parking lot in Manhattan: $20-$50/car. Cash.
• Some of the most talented people are also the most expert at getting in their own way. Be sure to stay out of theirs.

LOVE and SEX

• Don’t worry about finding someone to sleep with. The key is to find someone you want to wake up with.
• Sex doesn't become meaningful until you love someone. Which then leads invariably to not having sex.
• You’re not one of those guys who goes from girl to girl with ease. I know you wish you were — but it’ll all work out in the end.
• A date who asks for a doggie bag of Indian food at dinner, then carries it around the rest of the evening values you less than leftovers.
• The stronger person in a relationship is often the one who is crying.
• A marriage launched at 21 may fail, but the pain of it ending is well worth two great kids — and getting ur soul back.

FAMILY

• Let your kids do things themselves, even if you could do them better, faster and for less money.
• Ask Daddy 2 teach u2 play bridge. When he says he’s too busy, tell him this will benefit both of u and bring endless joy for years & years 2 come.
• You will learn that your kids' tears are amazingly cathartic and cleansing — for them. Still doesn't mean you should help generate them.
• Be willing to notice and receive wisdom from random & unexpected sources: license plates, blue jays, ur mother.

 
MONEY

• Invest in stocks and mutual funds exactly when everyone else is fleeing them. You won’t see those bargain prices again.
• Don’t ever trust a broker with your life savings — his job title is your fate.
• 2 words: Apple stock. Beg, borrow or, well, don’t steal, money 2 invest as much as u can in AAPL. Pls trust me on this.

LIFE

• Free advice: Don't worry so much. Live in the moment. Lie less. Shower more. Work hard. Kiss soft. And most important, shut up and listen.
• Figure out where the septic tank is before landscaping ur yard & make sure to have a working lock on the master bedroom door.
• Less Jackson Browne and Dan Fogelberg. More Bruce Springsteen.
• When ur 8 months pregnant, standing on a crowded bus & an older woman offers u her seat, ask the young guy next to her for his.
• All those hours working on our penmanship sure came in handy!
• Heed the advice that people over 50 give you. When you’re over 50, you’ll realize they were right.
• Late at night you like to clean up and finish the newspaper. But really, do us both a favor: Just go to bed.
• If you knew what I know now, we’d know better.