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The Week That Was
: Pope, Popcorn and Pilot

A recap of the week's most relevant (and irrelevant) events

Castro Meets the Pope On a tour of Cuba, Pope Benedict XVI was received warmly by communist strongman Fidel Castro — in a tracksuit. It wasn’t clear whether that was a form of protest against organized religion, but it was a definite upgrade from flotillas and firing squads.

Popcorn Declared Health Food University of Scranton researchers say popcorn has more antioxidants than fruit and vegetables, asserting that one serving of the crunchy snack provides more than 70 percent of the desired individual daily intake of whole grain. Calls to Scranton about the nutritional value of candy apples and cotton candy remain unanswered.  


Arlen Specter Works Blue The former conservative Pennsylvania senator heated up MSNBC’s Morning Joe when he said, "Mitt Romney has changed positions more often than a pornographic movie queen." You can see the senator every Tuesday at the Chuckle Hut in Pismo Beach.

Magic Johnson Leads Group to Buy Dodgers
The National League’s pre-eminent West Coast franchise is being purchased by the City of Angel’s preeminent sports personality. The country is holding its collective breath waiting for Larry Bird to buy the Boston Red Sox.

Airline Pilot Loses It in the Air Passengers on a flight from New York to Las Vegas tackled the Jet Blue pilot who left the cockpit and charged down the aisle shouting incomprehensibly about bombs and Iraq and Afghanistan. Hey summer travelers! Bet that $4.50 a gallon of gas doesn’t sound so bad now.

Jane Fonda to Play Nancy Reagan The biopic casting decision leaves future audiences scratching their heads and wondering what could possibly be next: Cher playing Mother Teresa? 

Elton John Turns 65 The former Rocket Man is officially a senior citizen! The bad boy rocker of the ’70s may be gone, but Saturday night’s still all right for fightin’ … only now it’s just with Madonna over awards.

Geraldo Apologizes Fox News commentator Geraldo Rivera said Tuesday that he’s sorry for suggesting that a hoodie worn by unarmed Florida teenager Trayvon Martin was as responsible for his own death as the guy who shot him. There has been no confirmation on whether the slandered sweatshirt has accepted the apology.

Dennis Rodman Behind on Alimony Payments The rainbow-haired NBA player who made headlines in the ’90s for kicking a courtside photographer, roughing up then-wife Carmen Electra and posing in a wedding gown claims he doesn’t have money for alimony. Who could have seen that coming?

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