Rich and Kirsten Meneghello and their daughter Lucy have dinner with Rich’s mom Margaret “Marge” Meneghello, 75, every Sunday, trading off between gathering at their house in southwest Portland, Ore., and Marge’s apartment a few miles away.
Rich and Kirsten Meneghello on a Zoom call with Rich’s mom, Margaret “Marge” MeneghelloBut they’ve been hunkered down in their respective residences since mid-March because of the COVID-19 pandemic. So, they had to figure out a different way to commune. Now they have a standing Zoom call every night at 7 p.m; Zoom is a popular videoconference service.
Some nights they talk for a few minutes. Other nights they dial into Zoom to play Yahtzee, using separate sets of dice and adjusting their laptops so the built-in webcams show what they rolled.
“I’ve been using Zoom for work for a while, so for me it was a natural suggestion,” Kirsten Meneghello said. “It’s been lovely. Video is so much more valuable than the phone. You can see the person’s energy and mood.”
As people practice physical distancing in the wake of the pandemic, connecting virtually has become the next best thing to being there for staying in touch with older family members, whether they’re a few miles away or across the country.
"It's been a lifesaver on both ends during this quarantine," Elizabeth Vowles said. "She loves being able to see us and  interact with us."
Video-calling services, connected tablets, smart-home assistants and other online devices have become lifelines for older people whose regular routines have been disrupted and for whom social isolation can lead to physical and mental health problems.
"The virus has been a way to prove that connecting virtually can decrease social isolation," said Liz Hamburg, founder of Candoo Tech, a company that provides tech support to older adults. “It has been a testing ground to prove that this can be done.”
Activating the ‘Granny Cam’
Some families were connected long before the outbreak, of course. Last year, Marian Dolan was stuck in the Philippines for a month after her mom was hospitalized unexpectedly while the two women were there to visit family. Her mom, Luz Reyes, 81, recovered, but needs kidney dialysis three times a week.
Dolan set up in her parents' house in San Francisco a connected video camera she got at Costco for $69 that she calls “the granny cam”  — to keep an electronic eye on them from her own home in Portland, 600 miles away. A mobile app connected to the device streams real-time video to Dolan’s phone.
Since the outbreak, she checks in on her mom and dad, Vicente Reyes, 83, every day. “Sometimes in the middle of the night, I look at it to make sure they’re okay,” Dolan said.


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The camera’s audio channel lets her pop in to talk instead of calling on the phone, which her folks find more intrusive. “When I call, they want to get off the phone because they’re in the middle of a Filipino soap opera,” Dolan said.
When Brett and Elizabeth Vowles moved his 86-year-old mother into an assisted living apartment in the Seattle area last year, Brett set her up with an Amazon smart-home device with a small screen and an Alexa digital assistant so they could make video calls.
The virus outbreak has hit Seattle especially hard — 2,580 cases and 132 deaths as of March 25 — and people have been sheltering in place there longer than almost anywhere else in the country. “It’s[the video calling] been a lifesaver on both ends through this quarantine,” Elizabeth Vowles said. “She loves being able to see us and interact with us.”
Getting Tech Support
Other families saw the coronavirus outbreak as a sign to get connected. Hamburg deals with a lot of them. Candoo Tech, which is New York-based, teaches older adults how to use smartphones, tablets, computers and safety devices such as fall detection devices and home sensors. It also provides subscription-based in-person and remote tech support.
Normally, the two-year-old company’s concierges make house calls across the tri-state area. That stopped in mid-March because of the outbreak. Since then, Candoo Tech ramped up online support for people who need help and created free online tutorials for FaceTime and Zoom and online shopping apps for using Amazon and Seamless.
The company is fielding a lot of calls from people who now need help getting tech things set up. One woman wanted assistance learning WhatsApp, the Facebook-owned messaging service, so she could use it to talk to a son living in Europe.
Candoo also assists its partner organizations helping their members stay connected. One is a New York City synagogue that switched all its in-person adult classes to online learning. “One of our last in-person sessions was at one of their classes to teach them how to get on Zoom,” Hamburg said.
Stumbling Blocks
Despite the best intentions, however, this kind of technology doesn’t always cooperate, as I can attest from personal experience.
Close to 20 family members dialed into a Zoom party I hosted for my dad’s 84 birthday on a recent Saturday night. One of my siblings gave my father and mother a quick lesson before the big day. My parents used the assigned link and access code to call in at the appointed time. But a bad Wi-Fi connection in their condo made it hard for other partygoers to see or hear them.
And establishing a solid virtual connection isn’t always about the technology. Some older adults need a little coaxing — not because they’re technophobes, a tired stereotype.
Carri Bugbee bought a tablet as a birthday present for her mom Connie, who turned 75 on March 22 and lives in Eugene, Ore., a two-hour drive from her daughter’s home in Portland. But her mom is not convinced she needs a tablet. “She wasn’t happy because she doesn’t like people buying her things,” Carri Bugbee said.
With church services and volunteering canceled, family get-togethers are more important than ever.
Connie Bugbee lives alone, doesn’t have a computer and cut the cord on cable TV after retiring last year. Because of the state’s shelter-in-place order, she can’t see her significant other. She thinks she should be able to get by with a phone, but Carri Bugbee thought it would be easier for her mother to video-chat, read e-books and watch her favorite British murder mysteries on something bigger than a smartphone screen.
So, Carri bought a Samsung tablet, added it to her own T-Mobile account and spent hours downloading apps and setting up accounts in her mother’s name. Then she mailed her the device. Despite the initial misgivings, by the second day, Connie had downloaded a few more apps. “She seems more interested and receptive,” Carri said. “I’ve realized I have to break her in slowly.”
Now Adept at Zoom
When Oregon’s shelter-in-place order took effect, it curtailed an active social life for Marge Meneghello revolving around church, volunteering at a local library and after-school program, as well as seeing friends and family. With church services and volunteering now canceled, family get-togethers have become more important than ever.
Thanks to the nightly calls, Meneghello has become so adept at Zoom, she uses it to chat with church friends, Kirsten Meneghello said.
The stay-home order canceled an early April trip to Alabama that Marge had planned to see a sister whose husband died recently (not of the virus) and another sister who lives there.
Instead, the three sisters connected — how else? — through Zoom.


Virtual Connections Have Never Been More Popular

Michelle V. Rafter

When government leaders instituted stay-at-home orders and other quarantine rules in the spring, more than just hairstylists and restaurants were suddenly shuttered. People’s love lives were instantly shelved, too, as the lack of places to go and concerns about the virus overshadowed the desire to couple.
Still, humans crave interaction, so online dating exploded in popularity.
The numbers tell the tale.
In research conducted April 22-24, 2020 by Morning Consult, a data intelligence firm, 31% of the 2,200 American singles surveyed who use a dating app reported "somewhat more" use of online dating apps during quarantine. And 22% revealed they were utilizing dating apps “much more” than they had pre-pandemic. Nearly half of those who use a dating app said they logged on every day.
The Challenges of Dating During Quarantine

Jane (not her real name), 59, who lives in Ohio, found herself single when her 37-year marriage ended in 2017. She lived alone for the 18 months prior to her divorce, giving her time to adjust to her new and strange reality. She began online dating six months after her divorce was finalized.
“I was thinking ‘where does a fifty-six-year-old go to meet people?’ Online dating seemed like the only viable option,” said Jane.
Over the past three years, Jane has tried five dating apps and has met over 106 men in person. She was in a relationship when Ohio issued its coronavirus quarantine orders on March 29, so the new rules didn’t impact her life much. However, when that relationship ended, “it was back to the drawing board” of online dating, she said.
"Everyone wore masks, which feels odd. It adds another layer."
Ohio lifted its stay-at-home orders on May 29. Since then, Jane has met five dates at either a park or outdoors at a restaurant. Sparks did not fly during any of those socially distanced meetings, but Jane said if they had, COVID-19 would not have kept her from kissing.
Kate Kaufmann, 68, likes to say her divorce was “completed” in 2016 following a 34-year-marriage. Soon thereafter, the Oregonian joined, then quit, Match.com, thinking it was too soon to start dating. In 2018, she spent three months on eHarmony, where she was emotionally misled by a would-be suitor.
In June 2019, Kaufmann returned to online dating. She joined OkCupid, where she met a man she dated for six months. She rejoined the site in January 2020 when the two of them broke up.


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Despite her reliance on the internet for assistance finding a partner, Kaufmann has not been on a virtual date during the pandemic. “I don’t even know what that means,” she admitted. Since quarantining became the norm, she has met two men face-to-face.
Kate Kaufmann“Everyone wore masks, which feels odd. It adds another layer. No one knows the protocols nowadays. I can’t even picture how it works to get to [becoming close],” she said. For her, kissing during COVID-19 is an absolute no-no.
While she does not find dating during the pandemic satisfying, Kaufmann has no plans of quitting.
Still, not every dating boomer agrees that physical interaction during COVID-19 is wrong, despite overall concerns about contracting the virus.
Tim (who asked that his last name not to be used), who has been divorced four years, has taken two women out since Ohio’s stay-at-home orders were lifted.
The 55-year-old Columbus resident said despite regularly donning a mask when he can’t social distance outside or in a store, he would consider having sex with a woman he met online. “If I trusted her, and knew she wore a mask in public regularly, I would even sleep with her,” he said.
Creative Virtual Dates

Norma Bryant Howard, 73, is a Louisville divorcee. She began hosting a weekly podcast on her Facebook page about boomers and dating in January 2020 because “I discovered there were so many women who had totally given up on the sanctity of having a loving connection with a high quality man,” she said. Her program, ‘The Princess Secrets: Dating Advice and More for Today’s Baby Boomers" is presented live on Fridays at 7 p.m. ET.
For example, they enjoy a dinner date over Skype every Saturday night. They each sit at their respective dining room tables and eat the same menu.
On a personal level, Howard has been in a long-distance relationship with her boyfriend for nearly nine years. Due to concerns about the virus, the couple has only seen each other twice since March.
Norma Bryant HowardThey keep their love alive in a variety of ways appropriate for a pandemic. For example, they enjoy a dinner date over Skype every Saturday night. They each sit at their respective dining room tables and eat the same menu. Thursday nights are reserved for Netflix movies, which they watch simultaneously, then discuss afterwards. Virtual tours of museums throughout the world and virtual cooking classes have also proven enjoyable.
Online Safety Tips for the Pandemic and Beyond

Eric Resnick fields dozens of questions from clients about dating every day. As owner of Profilehelper.com, Resnick has been helping singles write their dating profiles since 2005. That adds up to over 25,000 profiles on every dating site imaginable (unless the site promotes adultery).
Dating sites appeal to a wide range of audiences, from the general (like Bumble) to the niche (like Farmers Only). Still, “ninety percent of the dating market is probably on ten” sites, namely Match, Bumble, Hinge and OkCupid, said Resnick.
However, there is a nefarious side to the online experience. As dating apps gain in popularity, so do the opportunities for schemers to ply their craft.
Resnick cautioned daters aged 50 and older to be mindful of would-be partners who might be frauds because singles in that demographic are “the most regularly targeted markets for scammers.”
He urged boomers to stick to locals when it comes to online dating. That’s because distance is an excuse a scammer often uses to delay an initial meeting, pandemic notwithstanding. Meet face-to-face in a public venue within a week of an initial online encounter, said Resnick, “so the fantasy doesn’t keep building.”
According to Resnick, scammers prey on men and women differently. Widows over 60 are prime targets, with a popular ruse being the "hero scam." In that scenario, which usually occurs early in an online interaction, the scammer claims to have experienced a small emergency that can be resolved with less than $200 worth of assistance from the victim.
“You solve their problem, you feel like a hero and they know they’ve got you,” Resnick said.
Female scammers usually take longer to percolate. A favored scheme is less about a crisis and more about a “large opportunity, like property development. It’s a scam of opportunity and emotional blackmail,” said Resnick.
Despite the inherent risks associated with online dating, it is COVID-19-resistant.
Resnick said, “Now is a great time to try it because it gives you the opportunity to meet like-minded people without” the additional pressures of sexualizing the relationship.


Looking for Love During COVID-19

Tami Kamin Meyer

From her home computer in Kennett Square, Pa., Diane Hoffman first learned of Dunrovin Ranch when she became riveted by an osprey nest.
River view in fallThe year was 2012, it was springtime and the osprey were in the process of laying eggs — a webcam across the country in Lolo, Mont. capturing every around-the-clock detail of the nest located 57 feet above the ranch.
An avid birder, Hoffman was particularly intrigued by what was transpiring. "It was a failed nest, which was so interesting," she says.
Along with six other people watching online, Hoffman observed the entire process up until the point where the osprey (which she learned were named Ozzie and Harriet) became aware their eggs wouldn't hatch and soon abandoned the nest for the season.
Eager for more, Hoffman started a daily viewing of another Dunrovin webcam aimed at the barn and horses. Then, she says with a laugh, "I knew I was in deep."
Around the same time, Hoffman was also caregiving for her mother. She would share the virtual world she had discovered at Dunrovin with her mom, once an avid traveler who had become homebound.
"It was like a whole window had opened up for her," Hoffman said of her late mother. "She really felt like she was out and about, spending time in Montana."
A Sense of Place
In the eight years since founder SuzAnne Miller, 72, launched the virtual community, Days at Dunrovin, on the ranch she has called home for 22 years, located 15 miles south of Missoula, her passion project has become a virtual front porch, an online respite, and most importantly, a growing community of individuals, many older and living alone.
"We want to foster health and well-being for people, animals and nature, and we use the resources we have right here at Dunrovin Ranch," Miller says, adding that giving members of the online community "a sense of place" is so important to her.
"We bring the ranch alive for people."
In addition to webcams, complete with ambient microphones, focused on the horse barn and the osprey site (filled with bird feeders to attract winter birds when the ospreys are away), there are webcams along the nearby Bitterroot River, where someone could just watch the light and movement of the river and spot wildlife such as bears and elk from sun-up to sundown, every day of the year.
Dunrovin offers daily online programming; options include everything from a sunrise tour of the ranch led by one of the employees to a training session with a horse to a presentation called 'Birds of Dunrovin' hosted by Miller, also an avid birder. A rare appearance of a kestrel on the ranch was a recent topic.
"We bring the ranch alive for people," she says, adding that the majority of Days at Dunrovin followers don't come from a rural background but have long been interested in horses, for example, or just daily life on a ranch. "They are learning something completely new to them," notes Miller.
However, there's a lot of time when, as Miller says, "there's nothing happening," so people can just observe the ranch and the surrounding area in real time.
"I liken it to the front porch of yesteryear," she says. "You can sit and watch, but you don't have to pay rapt attention. It's not so exciting that it distracts from conversations."
Reading Books About the West Together
And there are a lot of conversations happening among followers of Days at Dunrovin. They include active chat groups, such as Ranch Chat (regularly populated with questions or comments about what viewers are observing on the ranch) and Community Chat ("That can be anything from what people are having for lunch to recipes — anything goes as long as what's posted is respectful and caring," says Miller.).
One of the most popular conversations is the book club, and like so much that happens at Dunrovin, it's a collaborative effort.
Judy Blunt, chair of the creative writing program at the University of Montana in Missoula and author of the bestselling memoir "Breaking Clean," curates the reading list for the monthly book club; the titles for the year are released every fall.
Miller's mission inspires Blunt.
"Her efforts to bring enrichment to people's lives and offer an outlet that is creative and tickles the learning bone a little bit are literally contagious," says Blunt.
The focus of the selections is literature of the West, which Blunt says speaks to universal themes like a sense of place and community. In addition to Blunt's memoir about growing up in eastern Montana, the group has read several titles in the genre including "Fool's Crow" by James Welch and "An Unfinished Life" by Mark Spragg.
According to Blunt, "Fool's Crow" was the first Native American literary book that many of the online book club participants had read. The book discussion also included a conversation with Welch's widow.
"The conversations are so valuable – you learn so much more about a book when you talk about it," says Blunt. "Stories can do so much to connect people, they can share their own experiences."
Another key player in the book club is Hoffman, who does research on the book and its author, and also moderates the message boards before and during the scheduled book conversations, offering participants the chance to ask questions. Many do.
"I'm the 'public facing' part of the book club," Hoffman says. She and Miller often moderate the sessions, with Blunt and any visiting authors joining in. "There are also a lot of people who watch who haven't read the book, but many go on to read it afterwards."
"SuzAnne has created a really important cyber environment; she's really led the way on building this community," says Hoffman.
Feeling Ownership of Dunrovin
Days at Dunrovin is subscription-based, with members paying $8 per month. Right now, there are more than 700 members worldwide, and Miller is always hoping to grow her base. Days at Dunrovin Ranch also has a YouTube channel, which is free, but there isn't an opportunity to engage in the program's community aspect.
"In the online world, you either have to pay by advertising or subscription," says Miller. "Once you start advertising, you turn your clients into customers, and I did not want them to be viewed in that way. I think of them as friends. I wanted them to have ownership of Dunrovin."
In light of the pandemic, Miller recently launched a new initiative called Monday Socials, sponsored by Friends of Dunrovin, where people can participate every Monday, free of charge.
"We want to give people a full Monday, 24/7, to get to know us and to socialize with us. If they want to join, great, but we won't push," she says.
Another goal of the Monday Socials is to give a respite to caregivers. "If someone has a loved one at home, we can help that person socialize and stay busy all day to help ease some of the socializing burden on the caregiver," Miller explains.
Over the years, the Dunrovin community has not only bonded together individually (many regulars have formed friendships on their own), but collectively in significant ways.
"If you want to engage people, there need to be shared experiences," says Miller.
There have been several at Dunrovin over the years.
People have watched the birth of a colt named Oggie (sticking with it for four nights in a row, with many across the globe altering their sleep schedules so as not to miss anything) and even participated in his naming.
"So many chimed in on the chat with stories of giving birth to their own children, of their own labors," Miller says. "That's the seed of real friendships."
And the community has observed death; a beloved horse broke its neck and Miller had to have a veterinarian come out to euthanize him.
"If you want to engage people, there need to be shared experiences."
"I asked if people wanted me to turn off the cameras, and they said no," she noted. "They started talking about death like you wouldn't believe. It wasn't like talking about a person's death; it was an opening without being too close."
After the death of the horse, Dunrovin community members came together to fund a tree in his memory, something they've repeated following the death of another horse, Annie, Oggie's grandmother.
"They are changing the ranch by adding these trees. They are making it their own," Miller says.
'I'm Taking Visions of the Ranch With Me'
Miller's goal is to make the Dunrovin model sustainable for the future, and she is currently working to secure additional funding.
SuzAnne with OggyThe ranch has as many as 10 employees during the summer months (Miller calls them "the boots on the ground" for Dunrovin followers riveted by their daily work), and two employees during the colder months.
But the lion's share of the work is done by Miller. "I do ninety percent of the web development and writing; I have a tech guy who works with the webcams," she says, adding that the steepest, and most expensive, learning curve was the installation and activation of the technology.
"I come from a background as a mathematician and scientist, so I wasn't afraid of the technology; I just went for it," she says.
Miller's research background also frequently comes into play as she studies the data of Dunrovin's frequent surveys to members (a Labor Day poll on first jobs generated many comments) and the impact of the social engagement on those who have come to think of Dunrovin as home.
During a virtual talk in June for the National Council on Aging, Miller shared some these statistics about Days at Dunrovin: 95% of participants are women, 60% are 60 and older, 29% live alone and 75% access the site daily.
While numbers are key to her work, the emotional connections to Dunrovin are what Miller finds inspiring, and what keep her committed to her mission.
"I've had people going into the hospital, asking me if I can send them a small piece of Dunrovin. I've sent feathers," she says. "Or they will tell me, 'I'm taking visions of your ranch with me.' You don't walk away from that."


The View From a Virtual Front Porch

Julie Pfitzinger

Sing holiday songs with a friend or friends virtually via Zoom or over the speakerphone. Arrange to have a Zoom date — or an in-person meal — the day before the holiday or the weekend after with a friend, who'll be observing the holiday alone. Make your get-together a "holiday celebration." 
Screenshare a movie or football game on the holiday via Zoom with someone who is alone … or view the football game or movie separately and text or talk about what you watched by phone afterward.
These are just a few of the many ideas compiled in holiday lists by Make Room @ The Table, a Milwaukee and Chicago-based affinity group, founded in 2020, which counts among its members health care professionals, social workers, community organizers, philanthropists and those who have worked in the aging space.
Make Room @ The Table belongs to the national Coalition to End Social Isolation and Loneliness, participates in the international Togetherness Hub and is a partner on the Far From Alone website.
"In the past, when loneliness and isolation were talked about, the onus was always on the lonely person to get out and do things."
For the second year in a row, members of the group brainstormed a list of simple, fun and kind suggestions to help combat loneliness and isolation during the holiday season — with an understanding this is an issue prevalent throughout the year, and affecting not just older adults but younger people as well.
There are actually two lists; one is for people who will be spending the holidays alone and the other is for people who may be looking for ways to engage friends, neighbors and others seeking companionship. (Full versions of the lists are found at the end of this story.)
A Conversation on Loneliness and Isolation 
Marcia Johnston, a founding member and convener of Make Room @ The Table, said she and other members of the group, numbering about a dozen, had all been talking about the issues of social isolation and loneliness in the aging space in their various capacities and that "it wasn't a new area, but the pandemic moved the topic to the front burner" in terms of awareness.
However, it was at a local symposium in June 2020 that she and future members of the group attended, with a focus on loneliness and isolation, which provoked something of an "aha moment." 

"In the past, when loneliness and isolation was talked about, the onus was always on the lonely person to get out and do things, to not just stay in their house," Johnston explained. "But in the presentation we heard, not once did that come up. It was about how the community should support people in the community who are isolated and alone." 
"Many of us were kind of blown away by that and wanted to get together to keep the conversation going," she continued. 
In July 2020, Johnston, who served for more than 25 years as an adviser to the Harry G. and Charlotte H. Slater Family Foundation, which supports programs for older adults in the Greater Milwaukee area, gathered (virtually) a group of others interested in determining some next steps.
Participants included Karen Graham, manager of community relations at Rush Medical Center Alzheimer's Disease Center in Chicago; Lucas Livingston, a member of the steering committee of the Arts and Brain Health Coalition in Chicago and Ruth Ann Watkins, a member of the Village Chicago social network for people 50+ and board chair for the Retirement Research Foundation. 
"Loneliness and isolation is a universal issue," said Watkins. "It's not just an issue facing older adults; intergenerational connections are so necessary." 
Accessibility of resources, and truly finding ways to bring everyone to the table, is a part of the issue that's important to Graham and one that was particularly magnified during the beginning of the pandemic. 
"One of the things I was finding with communities of color was that many people living in senior buildings and nursing homes were not able to get out and their loved ones weren't able to see them," she said, adding that once the vaccine became available, many were challenged to find ways to sign up that didn't require computer access.
"The pandemic has just brought to the forefront so many issues, especially among members of marginalized communities." 
And at her Chicago church, services pivoted online, but once it became clear that many members of the church community didn't have computer or internet access, a phone line was established so isolated individuals could call in and hear the services. 
Livingston, former assistant director of Accessibility and Lifelong Learning at the Art Institute of Chicago working with volunteers to bring art programs to older adults in the community, agrees with Graham.
"Loneliness and isolation have always existed. The pandemic has just brought to the forefront so many issues, especially among members of marginalized communities," he said. 
How the Holiday Lists Were Created 
One of the first projects of Make Room @ The Table was to create holiday lists with suggestions on how to make the holidays brighter and more inclusive for everyone. Johnston solicited input and suggestions from not only members of the affinity group, but several others as well. Last year, the list focused solely on Thanksgiving; this year, it includes Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, Christmas and New Year's Eve. 
"We had a wide range of intergenerational input — all of the ideas were really good," said Johnston, who compiled the lists for those celebrating alone and those looking for ideas on ways to engage with others. 
The lists are distributed via Make Room @ The Table's Facebook page and sent to more than two dozen organizations in the Chicago area that serve older adults as well as to the group's partner organizations across the country.
Feedback on last year's lists was very positive.
"Many of the organizations who received a copy really took it to heart," said Johnston. "They were holding virtual open houses and drop-ins, inviting community members to participate. We heard from them that the lists were very helpful and very impactful." 
Raising awareness about how loneliness and isolation impacts people of all ages is essential, according to Graham, who would like to see more research on the topic by the health care community, as well as the development of interventions.
Watkins agrees: "There is a need for all of us to make human connections, and five or ten years down the road, I'd like that idea to be accepted and valued, so that people wouldn't even have to give thought to reaching out to others — they would just do it."
The suggestions on these holiday lists, provided courtesy of Make Room @ The Table, seem like a good place to start: 
22 Tips for Spending the Holidays on Your Own 
Invite someone you know will also be alone to share a holiday meal via Zoom or in person. Talk about the dishes you’ve made for each course and why you included them on your menu.Bake some goodies to share with friends during the holidays. Experiment with new recipes. If they are a success — or a spectacular failure — display them on social media.Settle back in your favorite chair and become absorbed in a book you’ve been wanting to read.Stream a film. Fix a snack that carries out the theme of the movie — an ice cream soda if watching Judy Garland and Mickey Rooney or some warm croissants if catching a French film with subtitles.Dive into a project — like cleaning your closets — that you’ve been meaning to do but haven’t had time to tackle.Go through photo albums, diaries and calendars and relive holidays past when you celebrated with friends and family and were not alone.Take a walk by yourself or go for a ride. Or ask a friend or neighbor to join you on a stroll, staying socially distant and masked, if that seems prudent.Write a note to people you are thankful are in your life and mail it so your greeting arrives on the holiday. Or reach out to them by phone, e-mail or text and wish them a “lovely day.”Sign up to participate in the Audubon Christmas Bird Count that takes place from December 14, 2021 to January 5, 2022. The bird count is free, but you need to register in advance. Begin a journal or add to one you’ve already begun. Consider starting work on a memoir. Emphasize gratitude and the things in your life for which you are thankful.Attend a religious service online or in person.Get tickets to a virtual or in-person play, musical, jazz performance, dance recital or concert during the holidays.Offer to take care of a pet for a friend or neighbor who will be spending the holidays out of town. If feasible, volunteer at an animal shelter on the holiday.Plan a micro “adventure” — take a bus or cab or drive to a different neighborhood and view the holiday decorations outside the homes and in the stores. Sample hot chocolate and a pastry — or a holiday treat — in a local café you’ve never been to before.Check to see whether Mather Telephone Topics or Well Connected or other learning or social programs designed for older people are available via Zoom — either by phone or online — on the holidays.Write a story… create a poem… or make up a song. Begin knitting a sweater or scarf. Engage in a craft to make special presents for those on your gift list.Invite friends and neighbors to your home — or to Zoom — early on New Year’s Eve. Share champagne or wine and snacks to launch a New Year’s celebration. If you’re going to be home alone at midnight, arrange to call a friend or family member who is also alone as the clock strikes 12 to usher in the new year.Offer to fill in for a volunteer, so that person can celebrate with family. If it’s feasible to volunteer in person, you can do so. If not, see if there is a way you can volunteer online or by phone.If you are spending the holiday on your own as the caregiver for an older loved one who is physically challenged or cognitively impaired, try brightening up your festivities by singing familiar seasonal songs, listening to holiday music together or collaborating on simple projects like stringing popcorn garlands, decorating wreaths or wrapping presents.Contact a local university alumni relations office or community liaison department and ask if there are foreign students or faculty members who won’t be traveling to their home country for the holidays. You could offer to host an informal get together with them, such as a virtual or in- person caroling party on Christmas Eve or a Christmas or New Year’s Day virtual — or real life — open house.Plan ahead to cook a special holiday dish or entire meal for yourself. Or place an order for a holiday banquet from a restaurant or grocery store. Set the table with your favorite china and glassware. Make a centerpiece of brightly colored gourds, a Christmas poinsettia or Kwanzaa Kinara with Mishumaa Saba candles. Dress in your holiday best.Ignore the holiday and view it as just another day. Stick to your usual routine, take something out of the freezer and savor the gift of quiet time alone.14 Tips for Reaching Out to Those You Know Will Be Alone 
Call a friend or family member who will be alone on the holiday. Perhaps you can coordinate with others who know the person to space out calls throughout the day.E-mail someone who’s alone on a holiday. Send a video greeting from you and, if appropriate, members of your family.Arrange an in-person or virtual caroling party on Christmas Eve that includes friends and family members who will be alone.Enlist young folks to become pen pals, sending cards and letters — or poems, drawings, and stories — to older people who are alone on the holiday.Send a beautiful, animated e-card to be delivered on the holiday to a person alone. Have the message on the card reflect your gratitude that the person is in your life.Make time on the holiday to set up a Zoom date with someone who is alone. If feasible, include family members or mutual friends. During the virtual visit, you could light the candles together in a Kwanzaa Kinara or trim Christmas trees.Set aside a portion of your holiday dinner for a friend who is observing the holiday alone and deliver it to their door.Send or lend a book you enjoyed or found meaningful to a friend, who will be alone on the holiday and then plan to discuss it with the person by phone or Zoom on the holiday or shortly thereafter.Cook with friends who will be alone. Whip up innovative holiday delicacies, concoct tempting Yule logs or elaborately decorated Christmas cookies. Then sample some of your culinary creations together and comment on how they turned out.Write “letters of gratitude” to friends you know will be alone. Mail them so they will arrive the day before the holiday, but write “Do Not Open Until” — whatever holiday it is — on the envelopes.Invite a friend or neighbor who is alone to go for a walk — masked and socially distanced, if prudent — on the holiday.If someone you know lives alone but has holiday plans, check in at the end of the day to make sure those plans came to pass. If the plans fell through, the person will be disappointed and lonely and will be pleased to have the human contact. If the holiday get-together took place as scheduled, the person will be delighted to have the chance to share details with a friend.See if your senior center, house of worship or older adult social organization can arrange a virtual dinner or open house on the holiday to provide social connectivity for folks who’ll be by themselves.Make room at your table virtually…or in real life. Add a person who is alone to your guest list to dine with you and your family on the holiday. If it’s too much of a hassle to include someone who’s alone for an entire holiday meal, ask them to share dessert with you and your other guests. Or invite someone who is alone to dine with your family the night after the holiday and join you in a traditional holiday feast of leftovers.

Make Room @ The Table Offers Ideas To Ease Holiday Loneliness and Isolation

One thing the pandemic has taught us: intergenerational connections can be extraordinarily powerful for older and younger people when they're required to practice social distancing. During my recent fellowship in Columbia University's virtual 2021 Age Boom Academy for journalists covering aging, I learned about a few successful intergenerational strategies that have valued older adults during COVID-19 times.
At Columbia U.'s Age Boom Academy, experts spoke about intergenerational connections in the pandemicThe theme of this year's Age Boom Academy: "Combating Loneliness in Aging: Toward a 21st Century Blueprint for Societal Connectedness."
Here are highlights:
Why We Need Intergenerational Connections
Setting the stage for the need for intergenerational connections in America, Dr. Linda Fried, director of Age Boom Academy, dean of Columbia's Mailman School of Public Health and a Next Avenue Influencer in Aging, noted that the United States has a serious age-segregation problem.
In a recent article for the American Society on Aging's Generations magazine, she wrote: "Societal ageism, which makes older individuals invisible and devalued in society, and age segregation in housing and in work and volunteer roles have resulted in the United States being the most age-segregated society in the history of the world, with loss of intergenerational contact and solidarity."
"There is now a potential opportunity to build on the greater empathy, compassion, caring and concern that have been shown towards those experiencing loneliness and social isolation."
But Roger O'Sullivan, director of ageing research and development at the Institute of Public Health in Ireland spoke, noted that the pandemic has actually opened the door for more intergenerational connections. 
"There is now a potential opportunity to build on the greater empathy, compassion, caring and concern that have been shown towards those experiencing loneliness and social isolation," he said, "and to set in place policies and structures to address root causes and to support healthy choices."
Reducing loneliness and isolation, noted Dr. Carla Perissinotto, a geriatrician and palliative medicine physician at the University of California, San Francisco, can improve health in numerous ways. That's because loneliness and isolation can cause or increase health problems including dementia, cardiovascular issues, diabetes, stress and other mental health woes, Perissinotto said.
Intergenerational Connections in Action
Throughout the uncertainty, anxiety, loneliness and isolation felt during COVID-19, social entrepreneurs, nonprofits, researchers and other organizations have been researching the benefits of intergenerational technologies, helping realize the potential for connection, compassion and kindness.
When Joy Zhang, CEO and co-founder of the social engagement startup Mon Ami launched her business in 2016, she told the Age Boom Academy Fellows, she couldn't know how impactful her technology would become years later addressing social isolation and loneliness. But during the pandemic, when many older adults and college students couldn't see their families, Mon Ami has provided them with unexpected joys of connections.
Its technology lets older adults connect with younger ones who can address their basic needs, such as food, medications and companionship. Mon Ami now partners with over 20 agencies across nine states, such as the federal AmeriCorps Seniors program and Sage USA (which offers advocacy and services for LGBT elders).
Dana Griffin, co-founder and CEO of the intergenerational startup Eldera, said she's seen the impact her global online community has had, leveraging the wisdom of older adults as an asset for the next generation. 
Chapman University's Julianne O'Brian connected dance students with a senior centerGriffin's mission stems from being raised by her grandmother. She explained how valuing older adults as social capital lets Eldera connect the wisdom and experiences of "vetted mentors [with at least six decades of life experience] with kids for story time, help with homework or just a friendly conversation…a virtual village with a real soul that activates our elders as assets to society and their wisdom as a service to humanity." 
Making Intergenerational Connections Through Dance
Chapman University's Julianne O'Brian, chair of the school's dance department, shared the success of her intergenerational dance program during the pandemic, connecting dance students with a local senior center.
Students connected by phone with the older adults and listened to their poignant stories, ranging from being a Holocaust survivor to struggling with depression. The students then worked with their instructors and choreographed dance performances, capturing those older adults' lives in dance. 
O'Brian said, "As people age, they don't feel valued, they don't feel that their stories mean much. Seeing their lives in dance was tremendously meaningful and formed an emotional connection with the students reenacting moments in their lives."

She noted that the experience was also a lesson for all participants in listening, being present and connecting. O'Brian also learned that the older adults weren't the only ones who were lonely. "I didn't realize how lonely the students were," she said.
Judi, one of the senior center residents participating in the program, loved seeing how a Chapman dance student named Rosemary, reenacted her life. Their relationship has since blossomed with phone calls and visits.
"I thought, 'Why can't we have more young people coming to visit us old people?'"
"Rosemary and I are still friends. We talk once a week or once every other week. And her parents invited me for dinner. She is so sweet," said Judi.
Another resident, Theresia, shared the special feeling of seeing dance student, Megan, create a dance reflecting her life living through WWII. "When Megan danced, I could feel somehow a connection with that dance because I went through a hard life," Theresia recalled. "I felt like I was reliving my life when I saw her dancing." 
Lessons From Age Boom Academy
Theresia said she felt isolated and lonely during the pandemic and has struggled recovering from COVID-19. Getting to spend time with Meghan and seeing her perform gave her a lift. "I thought, 'Why can't we have more young people coming to visit us old people?' Old people can tell their stories and we learn from the young generation and you can learn from us, and that is my philosophy."
I came away from Age Boom Academy seeing how the pandemic has reinforced the necessity to value intergenerational connections, to focus on being present in conversations and how loneliness and social isolation impact mental, physical and emotional health at any age.
We must ask ourselves, "What role will I play in deconstructing ageism, reducing loneliness and isolation and connecting generations? "
There is a lot of work to be done, but the outcomes will be beneficial for all ages.


The Power of Intergenerational Connections to Reduce Loneliness

Janeane Bernstein

Fear and courage. Rage and hope. Loneliness and connectivity. Most of us have experienced these conflicting emotional states this year and now some art museums across the country are developing or expanding relevant exhibits and programs that reflect how 2020 has affected all of us.
Lion sculpture in front of the Art Institute of ChicagoOn the West Coast, "Close to Home: Creativity in Crisis," an exhibit that features seven Bay Area artists' responses to the global pandemic, will open Dec. 19 at the San Francisco Museum of Modern Art.
"I've always been fascinated by the way parameters can spur creativity, instead of limiting it," said Corey Keller, its curator of photography. "When the pandemic struck and we were all confined to home, artists also had to adapt to these newly constrained circumstances. I was struck by the way Bay Area artists found ways to respond to the crisis, expressing anxiety and loss, of course, but also joy and optimism."
Rodney Ewing of San Francisco and Andres Gonzalez  of Vallejo, Calif., both have works in the exhibit. "Shelter-in-place was really hard for me, and I wanted to bring back some structure to my life," said Ewing, 55. "To move forward, I gave myself a deadline for each piece, completing one every day and a half."
"I've always been fascinated by the way parameters can spur creativity, instead of limiting it."
Ewing's work, displayed on silkscreened frames, is from "Broken Shadows," a series he began late in March. Ewing repurposed some of his frames, swapping out images to continue the visual "conversations" about identity, race and the diaspora that often inform his art.
"One Has to Be""It made sense to reflect what I was feeling about the murders of Ahmaud Arbery, Breonna Taylor and George Floyd, and make new compositions," Ewing said.
Gonzalez has contributed black and white portraits taken with a large-format camera of redwood trees in his neighborhood. "When the lockdown first started, I felt paralyzed for four to six weeks, with no creative impulses," said Gonzalez, 43. "Then I picked up Richard Powers' book "The Overstory," and I could relate to the slowness of time depicted in the lives of the trees he writes about."
On a walk one day, Gonzalez noticed a specific tree close to his home, and returned later to photograph it. "At first, I thought taking the photo was a form of catharsis, a way to cope," he said. "Then I started thinking about redwood time as opposed to human time. I thought about illness too, how trees change when they are traumatized, and what they do to generate new growth."
"Behind the Lines"Museum’s Expanded Space to Display the Diversity 
In Texas, new growth at The Museum of Fine Arts (MFAH), Houston, is literal as well as figurative. On Nov. 21, the museum will increase its exhibition space by nearly 75% when it opens the new two-story Nancy and Rich Kinder Building.
"MFAH is at a crossroads in a way, a major turning point, and it's all coming together in a strange way," said Caroline Goeser, chair of the museum's learning and interpretation department. "We've all been living through the pandemic, and at the same time we've been so aware of the need for social justice and equity. The new building will allow us to have on view a reflection of the diversity of Houston, and that will allow people to see something of themselves, find art that is meaningful and relevant to them and enter into dialogue with it."
Soul of a Nation virtual panel discussion “Black Art through the Lens”Museum audiences want that, Goeser said. She cited a Culture Track survey conducted earlier this year where more than 120,000 cultural consumers in all 50 states responded to questions about "the role and future of culture and the arts in response to the COVID-19 pandemic."
A key finding indicated that many people were hungry for meaningful dialogue around cultural connections. "People are longing for that, but finding it hard to come by," Goeser said.
So when arrival at MFAH of the exhibit "Soul of a Nation: Art in the Age of Black Power" was delayed earlier this year because of the pandemic, the museum instead offered five virtual panel discussions with artists on such topics as Black art and activism and Black art and culture in Houston.
Virtual Programming Proves Its Value
"People told us they felt connected, that they had personal, intimate connections with the artists speaking from their homes and studios, rather than from a stage in a lecture hall," Goeser said. "We see virtual programming as something we would like to continue."
The museum also is planning more collaborations with performing artists and looks forward to holding cultural festivals on the plaza outside the new building.
For 2021, MFAH is considering installations in the new building around such themes as immigration, civil rights, social justice, collective identities and communities. "Photography, painting, sculpture and decorative arts would all be mixed together," Goeser said. "I think these exhibits will be a real draw."
In the Windy City, the Art Institute of Chicago (AIC) also is making changes.
"The pandemic has given us an opportunity to think about how to engage with our community in the future, find new ways for people to explore and enjoy the museum," said Kati Murphy, its executive director of public affairs. "Also, the amount of digital content we're sharing is unprecedented, and we're finding new ways to educate, share and explore creatively remotely with community organizations and schools."
"Virtual programming is part of the new normal because it makes everything more accessible to so many more people."
In response to the murder of George Floyd, Murphy noted that AIC is examining "how we look at equity…and bringing in voices outside the circle of leadership to find different ways to address what has been inequitable in the past so we can move forward as antiracists, as opposed to being neutral."
For years, Murphy said, the museum has collected art "by diverse makers, including Archibald Motley and Charles White and others that came from Chicago during the Black renaissance in the early 20 century, collecting as the artists created their work."
AIC continues to do that. "Also, we're working to expand ways to collect and also to look at our museum operations," said Murphy. "We can always do better, and we're prioritizing that."
The Minneapolis Institute of Art (Mia) is assessing how all its programs — lectures, events, blogs, podcasts and exhibitions — can have a hybrid reach.
"Virtual programming is part of the new normal because it makes everything more accessible to so many more people," said Kristin Prestegaard, the museum's chief engagement officer. Mia also is expanding its emphasis on highlighting local cultures.
Installation views of "Foot in the Door 4", MAEP Galleries; galleries 264-265Helping Audiences Connect with Local Cultures – and Each Other
It has partnered with the Somali Museum of Minnesota on "Khatt Islami: Sacred Scripts from Islamic Africa," an exhibit on Arabic calligraphy that opens Oct. 31.
"Minneapolis has the largest Somali population outside of that country," Prestegaard said. "We also have a large Hmong population, and early next year we will redo our main corridor, lining it with Hmong works of art."
At the same time, Prestegaard said, Mia is being careful not to overstep.
"We're listening to what our audiences need but intentionally, we're taking a back seat to everything our community partners are asking for. When George Floyd was murdered, local artists created many murals, and some people said we should collect these and put them on display," she said. "We're on standby, waiting to see if anyone asks us to help them do that."
"We're providing a platform for anyone who says, 'I want to make art, to express myself.'"
The Culture Track survey Goeser cited also found that two-thirds of those who participated were looking for hands-on or creative outlets. Mia has recognized that for a long time. Every 10 years for four decades, the museum has sponsored an exhibit called "Foot in the Door."
"Any person who lives in Minnesota and identifies as an artist can submit a work one cubic foot in size," Prestegaard said. "We're providing a platform for anyone who says, 'I want to make art, to express myself.'"
Historically, the exhibit has displayed as many as 5,000 works of art and drawn more than 100,000 visitors. Because social distancing protocols keep the museum from accommodating such large crowds just now, "Foot in the Door 5" will open Nov. 2 as a virtual presentation.
"We've had entries from children, high-profile artists, and individuals in a homeless encampment, where we've helped provide materials," Prestegaard said. "This exhibit is humanity. That's very cool."


2020 Challenges Lead to Changes at Art Museums

Patricia Corrigan

Are there any silver linings for the future of aging coming out of COVID-19? And what lessons have we learned from the pandemic that could improve the health of older — and younger — Americans?
These experts at the Milken Institute Future of Health Summit saw challenges and opportunities for older adults resulting from COVID-19A panel of experts and I, as the moderator, looked for answers at the recent virtual Milken Institute 2021 Future of Health Summit panel: COVID-19 and the Future of Aging. (The Milken Institute is a nonprofit, nonpartisan think tank.) Our panel helped kick off the two-day event, featuring more than 200 speakers and 1,000 participants. You can watch our session on the summit's site and read highlights here.
"I'm hoping this pandemic redefines what we mean by 'We're all in this together.'"
"I'd like to think that the pandemic is pushing us, forcing us to reframe, redefine and reconfigure what kind of society we want," said panelist Fernando Torres-Gil, director of UCLA's Center for Policy Research on Aging. "Certainly the pandemic brought out that many populations were at great risk — whether from COVID, the lack of access to medical care, social isolation — and certainly impacted older adults at a disproportionate level."
But, Torres-Gil added, he also thought the pandemic "gives us some potential silver linings or opportunities which will hopefully cause us to rethink what do we mean by 'essential?' Who are the essential members of society that have been invisible for so long?...So many segments of society have been invisible, but during the pandemic were critical to the functioning of society."
The Milken Institute Health Summit Panelists
And, he added, "my hope, and one of the great silver linings, is that we began to realize that everyone matters and we need and want to reconstruct both the social safety net and its social contract…I'm hoping this pandemic redefines what we mean by 'We're all in this together.'"
Joining Torres-Gil on the panel: Richard Ashworth, CEO of Tivity Health (whose company includes the SilverSneakers fitness programs for older adults); Trent Stamp, CEO of The Eisner Foundation (focused on programs uniting the generations) and Lauren Dunning, director of the Milken Institute Center for the Future of Aging.
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Torres-Gil, Ashworth and Stamp were among the Milken Institute Center for the Future of Aging's Advisory Board members who wrote Next Avenue articles about COVID-19 and the Future of Aging from October 2020 through March 2021; the Milken Institute just released the series as an online report.
The Future of Summit panel focused on four themes that came up in our series of articles: COVID-19 and older adults; ageism; technology and intergenerational connections. "They suggested critical areas of opportunities for additional focus," Dunning said.
When we began, I asked our audience to tell us in one word what they thought would be the biggest societal change that will persist post-pandemic.
The answers were revealed in the Word Cloud below and you'll see the most popular ones were: "work," "telehealth," "digital" and "flexible." Of course, "Zoom" came up, too.
COVID-19 and Older Adults
I noted that, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, eight in 10 deaths from COVID-19 were among people over 65.
"The medical community is continuing to try and figure out what are other factors that were driving the morbidity and mortality rates coming out of COVID-19," said Ashworth. "And one factor is chronic disease. Preventable conditions — things like obesity — don't happen overnight. They're the result of a lack of routine health care, of not having health foods and other socioeconomic factors that cause some of the inequity in access to care or behaviors."
Ashworth said that increasing the proportion of people who have medical insurance and a primary care doctor "would solve a lot of our problems."
African Americans, Hispanics, Asian Americans, Pacific Islanders, Native Americans in immigrants "are facing tremendous economic and social disparities and despair in the pandemic," Torres-Gil said.
"We saw that especially older minorities — in particular, Black and brown — were really facing vulnerable situations. If they were in the poorly funded publicly financed Medicaid skilled nursing facilities, which were poorly staffed with low-wage workers and therefore poor quality care, they were more vulnerable to the ravages of COVID," Torres-Gil added.
Dunning noted: "So many of our experts [in the Next Avenue articles] highlighted the urgency of the need for investment in geroscience research, given the disproportionate harm inflicted by the pandemic on older adults and communities of color."
Torres-Gil said two concepts in the new California Master Plan on Aging he helped create might be helpful over the long term: Looking at aging through an equity lens and taking an intergenerational approach.
"Ageist messages were front and center during the pandemic," said Dunning.
He said younger members of Asian, Latino and African American communities are "at great risk in their future longevity precisely because of the lack of good, healthy aging options, healthy eating options, healthy exercise options. And we're going to find that the growing incidences of obesity and diabetes among young Black and brown and ethnic individuals means that as they get older, they will be at greater risk for a variety of chronic conditions."
Torres-Gil raised this question: "What can we do now to work with the youth to give them a better opportunity for healthy aging and a longer longevity?"
Ageism
"Ageist messages were front and center during the pandemic," said Dunning. "And it became clearer than ever that older adults experienced bias in their daily interactions, health care, workplaces, across the board."
The Milken Institute Center for the Future of Aging has noted that a Twitter analysis of more than 18,000 tweets in March 2020 showed that about a quarter of all tweets could be considered ageist.
"We certainly saw during the pandemic tremendous ageist attitudes and approaches to how we address health and long-term care, as well as vaccinations," said Torres-Gil. "But let us also add there was ableism, where we saw discrimination against those who had some level of disability, whether it was cognitive, visual, hearing or physical."
One of the great challenges for society, he added, "is how do we inform, educate and convince younger cohorts in society that they too will be old someday…so we can avoid what we saw in the pandemic — that older persons and persons with disability were seen as expendable."
Torres-Gil, who's 73, then spoke personally, telling the audience that he is a polio survivor. "We discovered like thirty years after those of us got the polio infection that the virus had long-term effects that never went away. And now my generation of polio survivors are facing what we call 'post-polio syndrome — many of the symptoms are coming back. "
So, he said, "how do we educate younger persons to realize that maybe you were young and invincible, maybe you survived a COVID-19 infection, but in twenty, thirty, forty years, we don't know if it's going to have long-term repercussions as we are seeing with polio survivors."
Technology
Dunning noted that "we've all felt the impact of the increased reliance on technology during COVID-19 — from ordering groceries online to making telehealth appointments." Indeed, the percentage of older adults who participated in a telehealth visit went from 4% in 2019 to 30% in June 2020.
So, the pandemic accelerated those shifts toward a more digital future. And while there's great promise in that, we need to focus on narrowing that digital divide, so we don't leave anybody behind," Dunning noted. Today, 34% of people on Medicare who are living below the federal poverty level have no internet usage.
Also, Dunning said, "we need to focus on solutions that accommodate things like hearing, visual and cognitive impairments."
Ashworth said his company saw COVID-19 breaking the myth that older adults are technology-averse. "We're seeing a significant amount of folks engaging with us digitally and virtually," he noted. But, he added, we need to expand broadband to many rural communities lacking access to the internet.
Social Isolation and Intergenerational Connections
Nearly a quarter of adults 65 and older were considered socially isolated before the pandemic and during COVID-19, social isolation among older adults increased. More than half of adults 50 and older reported social isolation in the pandemic, I said.
"Social isolation has really serious impacts on physical health and well-being, including the risk of premature death," said Dunning.
"The pandemic made social connection really hard," said Ashworth, who noted the fitness centers with SilverSneakers programs had to close their doors early on. "So, we pivoted to virtual fitness," he noted.
While many older adults have taken to virtual exercise programs and are now returning to fitness centers, a recent Tivity Health survey found that only 12% of its members said that over the next three months they plan to return to the same level of exercise they had before the pandemic.
"That means a significant amount are saying, 'Hmmm, I'm not really sure what I'm going to do," Ashworth said.
One potential antidote to ageism, Dunning said, is intergenerational connection. In fact, when we polled our audience to see which strategy they thought would be most critical for reducing social isolation post-pandemic, a striking 66% said "in-person, intergenerational programming."
Stamp responded: "When we get older and younger people in the room together to see each other's shared visions and challenges, good things can happen."
Dunning said that in her Center's articles for Next Avenue, "our experts advocated for the creation of fostering of intergenerational workforce initiatives, community spaces and living arrangements and all the ways we can connect to enhance collaboration among the generations."
Stamp agreed, saying it's important to invest in intergenerational programs that foster empathy. "We've known for a long time that the two groups in our society that are the loneliest are the young and the old," he said.
But, Stamp added, "It's important to acknowledge upfront that we very intentionally segregated the generations in this country over the past century. There's not biological, nothing natural about separating our generations. We did it on purpose."
The United States, he added "created mandatory retirement ages and Social Security to get older workers out of the workforce; we created schools where  we wanted single-age groups; we created housing communities where we didn't want any kids in them."
It's going to take "an intentional effort on our society to bring folks back together," said Stamp.
That means, he added, "We need to embrace and normalize the idea of older volunteers in classrooms. We need to embrace and celebrate children in retirement communities…We need to find that the contributions of every generation in our workplace have value and we need to build multi-generational teams that can learn from each other. There's a thirst for this generativity."


What COVID-19 Means for the Future of Aging

Richard Eisenberg

(Editor's note: This story is part of a special report for The John A. Hartford Foundation.)
It looked like a bad case of shingles. At least that’s what the doctor working at a hospital in rural Virginia thought when he examined a patient who had come in. Still, he wanted to be sure. So he arranged to consult with a dermatologist.
But the specialist was not just down the hall, or even in an office across town. He was hundreds of miles away at the University of Virginia. The consultation would occur over the Internet, with the dermatologist doing a virtual examination of the woman’s damaged skin.
It turned out it wasn’t shingles. The doctor on the other end of the video connection recognized the condition as something much more serious — a flesh-eating strep infection. Immediate, aggressive treatment with surgery and antibiotics was necessary and the woman recovered.
That’s a dramatic example, but one that reflects a trend that’s beginning to transform rural health care in America: the use of telemedicine to compensate for the dwindling supply of doctors in rural communities.
Examining and diagnosing patients remotely is a long, long way from the iconic, hands-on country doctor. But it appears to be the future model for treating those living where stoplights — and specialists — are few and far between. And it is especially needed for rural older adults whose transportation options may already be limited by their inability to drive and lack of public transit.
Less Driving, More Access to Specialists
“A picture may be worth a thousand words, but video is worth a whole lot more,” says Dr. Karen Rheuban, co-founder of the University of Virginia's UVA Karen S. Rheuban Center for Telehealth. “If you’re able to see the patient, communicate with the patient, examine the patient [through videoconference], it’s a far more accurate evaluation.”
Ideally, a doctor would do that in person. But Rheuban knows from her own experience as a pediatric cardiologist who used to drive “all over Virginia” to see patients that it’s no longer realistic for rural residents to have that kind of relationship with physicians.
One of the missions of the UVA telehealth center is to help people avoid traveling long distances to get care. By Rheuban's estimate, it has saved Virginians almost 17 million miles of driving since opening more than 20 years ago.
The center also has greatly expanded its reach, now connecting patients to doctors in more than 60 specialties, from neurology to sleep apnea to mental health. The same is happening at medical schools around the country, as technology opens up more and more online treatment options.
Here are five examples of how telemedicine is becoming a core component of rural health care. Several are in areas that predominantly affect older adults:
Beating the clock on strokes   Neurologists have a saying, “Time is brain,” meaning doctors have a limited amount of time — less than three hours — to begin treating a stroke before brain damage begins. First, they must quickly determine if the cause is a blood clot or the result of bleeding into or around the brain. It’s a critical call because treatment for the first — medication to dissolve the clot — could exacerbate the second.
But many small rural hospitals can’t always have a neurologist available. And fewer have neurologists specializing in stroke care. In the past, that would have meant the patient likely was transferred to another hospital, wasting valuable time. Now, telemedicine provides a way to beat the clock.
When a possible stroke victim arrives at an emergency room, the doctor can connect with a neurologist online, who can view and even talk to the patient via streaming video. That expedites a diagnosis and a decision on what to do next.
“We can collaboratively decide about the most appropriate treatment,” said Rheuban, “whether it’s administering clot-busting medicine or whether the patient needs to be transferred or whether there are other tools available.”
In places where wireless broadband is widely available, the process can start even sooner. Emergency crews can reach out to a doctor for help from the back of an ambulance. “That means earlier intervention, which can make a big difference,” said Rheuban. “We feel we’ve leveled the playing field for our rural partners.”
Screening out diabetes blindness   Diabetic retinopathy is the leading cause of vision loss in working adults, despite the fact that it’s largely  preventable. That’s why the American Diabetes Association recommends people with diabetes get an eye exam every year. Still, only about half comply, and research suggests the percentage is considerably lower in rural areas.
Telemedicine programs around the country, however, have started to tackle the problem. Nurses in rural communities are being trained to use special digital cameras to capture images of the retinas in both of the patient’s eyes. The photos are then sent electronically to an ophthalmologist who analyzes them for any sign of retinopathy. If a problem is spotted, an appointment is made with a specialist to get follow-up treatment.
Providing easier access to screenings appears to be making a difference. A recent study of almost 1,700 adults participating in the North Carolina Diabetic Retinopathy Telemedicine Network found that once virtual exams became an option, the screening rate among the patients rose from 25 percent to more than 40 percent.
According to Dr. Seema Garg, a retina specialist who led the study, 80 percent of the diabetes patients in the study showed no sign of the condition, and 11 percent had mild to moderate retinopathy. But 9 percent had severe cases that required treatment. Not surprisingly, older patients were more likely to be in the last group.
Managing burn treatment   Another area where smaller community hospitals are taking advantage of telehealth is in treating burns. Most ER doctors in rural areas don’t see a lot of burns, so when they do, the tendency is to be overly cautious and transfer the patient to a burn center. Often, that results in a long, needless trip.
The alternative is to enter into a partnership with a “teleburn” program that provides access to specialists at university hospitals, including the Ohio State University Wexner Medical Center and the University of Utah. Doctors at the latter, for instance, consult with hospitals over a large region, including Colorado, Idaho, Montana, Wyoming and Oregon.
One of the more established teleburn centers is at the Lehigh Valley Hospital in Allentown, Pa. Since it opened in 2008, it has provided consultations for nearly 5,000 patients from smaller hospitals in Pennsylvania, Delaware, New York and New Jersey.
The teleburn center is connected to partner hospitals or offices through a mobile app. When a burn patient comes into an ER, a handful of photos are taken of the wound and then uploaded, along with pertinent personal information, and sent through the app. The pictures appear on the iPhones of the teleburn staff no matter where they are, enabling them to provide a timely diagnosis. They get as many as 75 to 80 calls a month.
“We’re able to see the wound, determine the depth,” said Patrick Pagella, a nurse practitioner there. “At the same time, we can determine the body surface area of the burn, which can help us evaluate whether they need treatment at a burn center.”
Easing pain  An estimated 100 million Americans suffer from chronic pain — which is pain lasting more than three months — and this results in almost 70 million doctor visits a year. That makes it a prime candidate for telemedicine innovation.
While treating pain usually requires in-person examinations, managing it offers opportunities for using virtual connections. Rural doctors, for instance, are doing video consults with addiction specialists to broaden their knowledge of how to address opioid abuse. One study, in fact, concluded that primary care doctors who consulted with pain management specialists wrote fewer prescriptions for the high-dose painkillers most often tied to addiction and overdoses.
Another study of 250 chronic pain patients using primary care clinics found similar benefits to long-distance counseling. Half of the patients received standard care for a year, while the other half also received regular telephone monitoring. Patients in the latter group reported 30 percent less pain and fewer of them began taking larger doses of opioids.
Recent research involving people 50 and older with knee pain suggests that telehealth can also be an effective way to help people learn to reduce their pain. Half of the study subjects received educational material on dealing with pain, while the other half were provided with a more extensive pain-coping program, including seven Skype sessions with a physical therapist. After three months, the people in the second group reported considerably more pain relief and improvements in physical function.
Providing mental health help   Perhaps no aspect of health care has more to gain from telemedicine than mental health therapy. Not only isn’t it necessary for a patient and therapist to meet face-to-face, according to advocates, but in many rural communities, mental health professionals are rarer than doctors.
Rob Marino knows this first-hand. He runs the Free Clinic in Fauquier County, Va., a semi-rural community about an hour west of Washington, D.C. “The number of mental health professionals in this region is pathetic,” he said. “It’s nowhere close to what is needed.”
So since last fall, visitors to the clinic have been able to talk to therapists in other cities. Marino explained that patients go into a private room, and once a staff member sets up the video connection, they are left alone to talk with the therapist.
“They have an appointment just as if they were meeting with that health professional in an office,” he said. “And when they come out, we help them set up the next appointment. We get a summary of what happened in the visit and we share that with their primary care doctor. That doctor and the clinician are part of that patient’s team.”
Marino admits that he wasn’t sure how people would respond to virtual therapy sessions. But he said it’s gone far better than he expected.
“I wondered at first, ‘What are they going to think? They’re talking to a computer screen.’ But I did it myself. After the first few minutes, you don’t even notice the computer anymore.”


Telemedicine: A Lifeline for Rural Residents

Randy Rieland

When you hear the two letters VR (for virtual reality), you probably conjure up images of obsessed video gamers, lurching around their basements in futuristic headsets.
Seriously now, what allure could this sci-fi technology possibly hold for a boomer at midlife and beyond?
Frankly, quite a lot. VR allows for intensely "real" simulated experiences. Businesses like MyndVR and Viva Vita are producing virtual "bucket-list" travel experiences, whether that means swimming with dolphins in Mexico or hot-air ballooning across the Southwest – a huge boon for people who can't travel due to mobility, health or financial issues.
The Issue of Isolation 
But there's something more significant on the horizon: immersive experiences going deeper and helping tackle isolation and cognitive decline, two of the biggest issues as we age. 
One report found that nearly 1 in 4 adults aged 65 and older are considered to be socially isolated, which significantly increases a person's risk of premature death from all causes and is also linked to a 50% higher risk of dementia.
"We wanted to offer residents a new avenue for experiencing things and reminiscing in a positive way." 
How can VR help? Rendever, a Massachusetts-based company, offers one path. 
Kyle Rand, co-founder and CEO, was a college student when he began to observe how isolation diminished his beloved grandmother's quality of life, and he vowed to do something about it. He's been working ever since to use VR "to power new social connections via shared experiences – nothing is more important for this demographic," he says.
Rather than being a solitary pursuit, VR group "outings" await. Instead of putting on a headset and wandering through a vivid landscape solo, you can stroll around Paris' Left Bank and chat with your amis (friends) about what you are seeing.
Julie Bauman, executive director of Ohio Living Breckenridge Village, a community in Ohio, has partnered with Rendever for almost a year, and has seen firsthand the impact group VR can make.
"We wanted to offer residents a new avenue for experiencing things and reminiscing in a positive way. We schedule a dozen or so group sessions a week, and the immersive experience is very powerful," Bauman says, adding that participants reach out with their hands as they, say, travel through Machu Picchu ("They are really there, right in it!") and afterward stay and discuss the experience.
"It transports people to a different place in a way that is otherwise unavailable," she says, "and it creates conversations and connections, more than a slide show or screening ever could."
Studies support this observation: MIT research showed that assisted-living residents who engaged in VR versus showed fewer indicators of depression and social isolation and enjoyed better moods than ones who watched television.
Oh, The Places We Will Go!
Another way VR can uplift aging is by connecting people who can't be together IRL (in real life). 
Families today are often far-flung, with one in four older adults living alone. Some VR companies are piloting programs in which an elder and a family member in different places each get a headset and go virtual adventuring together, distance be damned. This may reinvent the family reunion, with clans gathering on tech-created virtual mountaintops and beaches – wherever our imaginations lead.
Is it a replacement for sitting across the table from another human? No, but VR may be the next best thing. 
"Technology has vast potential, not as a substitute for face-to-face but as a complement and conduit for that," says Sara Czaja, a professor of gerontology at Weill Cornell Medical College and the founder and director of CREATE (Center for Research and Education on Aging and Technology Enhancement).
Unlocking Meaningful Memories 
Beyond creating new, shared memories, VR can also channel those we already have stashed in our memory banks. Virtual reality is playing a more prominent role in reminiscence therapy, which involves revisiting one's past (sharing photos, songs, memories and more) to improve self-esteem and contentment. It can be especially valuable for those experiencing cognitive decline.
"Technology has vast potential, not as a substitute for face-to-face but as a complement and conduit for that." 
"Individuals with dementia may lose a lot of recent past, but many memories and emotions from farther back are still there," says Bauman. "An immersive experience can provide a space to remember and discuss something important from past." 
A VR session can take you back to the street you grew up on, for example, or the arena where you saw the Stones play in '78.
That kind of flashback can be more than just comforting. 
Bauman recalls one example of a resident with speech issues who had only been able to communicate with one or two words at a time. When this individual joined a VR experience trekking along the iconic Pacific Crest Trail, which weaves down America's West Coast – boom! Memories were unlocked. The person had hiked part of this path decades earlier and was able to share those experiences, communicating with five- or six-word sentences.
The research on VR in this realm is quite promising. A 2020 study found that digital reminiscence therapy (uploading and sharing materials that will trigger personal memories) improved the mood of people with dementia and provided more social-interaction opportunities. And UK research showed that VR experiences helped reduce aggression and improve interactions among this population.
 "VR can clearly have positive benefits for patients with dementia, their families and caregivers. It provides a richer and more satisfying quality of life than is otherwise available," Jim Ang, one of the 2020 study's researchers, has said. 
The experience may be virtual, but the results are real and positive, showcasing just how well this technology will improve our ever-longer lives.


Ready Player One: How VR Will Reinvent Aging

Janet Siroto

Rose Binder, 93, of Queens, N.Y., is homebound. She has no stores in her neighborhood, and taking an accessible taxi service makes her “very nervous,” she says. “Sometimes they come late or they don’t show up and I have to keep calling.” Even speaking on the telephone is difficult for her.
For many people in her position, life would be lonely and isolating. But thanks to something called a Virtual Senior Center, operated by the nonprofit Selfhelp Community Services, Binder’s time is filled with intellectual and cultural riches. Moreover, she has the chance to make friends and to regularly chat with them face-to-face — all from the comfort of her home.
Each week, the Virtual Senior Center offers some 30 online classes to homebound clients, from tai chi and exercise to contemporary history discussions and gallery talks with museum curators, as well as music appreciation and singing — even Mandarin. Participants use a simple touch-screen computer to join in, as well as to Skype, play games or use the Internet.
Technology to Alleviate Loneliness and Depression
Selfhelp partnered with Microsoft and the City of New York to develop the center. “The whole point is to marry technology with homebound seniors, to alleviate loneliness and depression,” explains Carmella Chessen, Selfhelp's outreach/volunteer coordinator. “We want them to join four classes a week as a minimum. They have to want to be social and to learn the computer.” They also cannot have cognitive issues, she adds.
The program serves more than 200 people, with an average age of mid-80s, although one participant is 100. More than half are in New York, with others connected through partner organizations in Chicago and Baltimore.
“I especially like any classes that give you information like history, art or museums, so I try to do as many as I can,” says Binder. “But unfortunately I have to eat lunch and I skip something. Where else can you get such a wonderful array of classes without going to class?”
Another participant, Amanda Fajardo, 83, especially enjoys the music classes and the opera. “We always learn something new,” she says.
Fajardo became involved with the Virtual Senior Center after her husband died two years ago. “I was alone and they offered me the program and they helped me a lot,” she says. “You have company and you don’t feel like you are isolated. I have my family, but still I have to spend a lot of time by myself.”
Research has found that loneliness contributes to many physical ills, among them heart disease, poor immunity and Alzheimer’s. To help counter loneliness, the Virtual Senior Center is all about participation and relationships. Unlike other distance learning where people often sit anonymously at their computer screens, participants engage here not only with the instructor but with each other, and friendships form.
Like a Gallery Talk From Home
“I was interested in duplicating the experience you have when you attend a gallery talk,” says instructor Nelly Silagy Benedek, director of education at The Jewish Museum. “It’s interactive, you make eye contact — with most online learning classes, you lose that. With this, it’s a limited number of students, you can talk with them, you can really get to know them.”
Using a video chat system, each participant appears on the screen and conversations are in real time. Participants may choose to mute themselves, be invisible, or click on a big yellow hand icon to be called upon — although people often jump in with comments.
In a recent class, Benedek engaged participants by asking them to compare and contrast pieces of art now showing in an eclectic exhibit at her museum, called Unorthodox. She drew their attention to aspects of light, color and composition, soliciting their thoughts.
“I was definitely not sure what to expect at the beginning because I wasn’t sure if I could create that one-on-one connection in a virtual space and I was a little bit concerned I’d just be lecturing,” Benedek says. “But they’re very comfortable with each other and with expressing their opinions.”
Making a Personal Connection
In one class, Benedek was showing a work of art that depicted a Hasidic Jewish man wearing a traditional fur hat called a shtreimel. “One gentleman said, ‘just a minute,’ and he came back with an old faded picture of himself as a young man wearing a shtreimel — it was pretty incredible,” she says. “He was able to make that personal connection and share his experience with everybody. The participants often talk about their own personal experiences, which is often touching.”
In addition to The Jewish Museum, Chessen has formed partnerships with The Museum of Modern Art, The New York Historical Society and others to offer high-quality classes.
Joe Margolin, who teaches a lively contemporary history class, says “this is one of the most intellectually challenging activities that I’ve ever done in my life," because he's hit with so many interesting viewpoints. "It’s probably one of the things that’s keeping my cerebellum and cerebrum going.”
A recent discussion he led on the history and arcane rules of the political party nominating process was punctuated with laughter. “I’m not exaggerating when I say most of us have become friends,” Margolin said, and then added jokingly: “Janice and I are considering getting engaged.”
“You’re making me jealous,” piped up another woman.
Eyewitness Schmooze
At the end of the class, participants reflected on why they appreciate the Virtual Senior Center. “I’ve never been to college,” Patti, one of the younger students, said. “For me, it's a great opportunity to learn because many of our participants were there during the Roosevelt years and World War II, so I’ve learned a tremendous amount from people who were eyewitnesses.”
“We all respect each other’s views and opinions,” added James, another participant. “And we care about each other. If someone is absent, we want to know why.”
For these participants, the Virtual Senior Center, supported by grant money, is free. To move toward a more sustainable financial footing and to make the center more widely available, Selfhelp now offers it to others who are homebound, for a fee. Tuition for an unlimited number of classes is $60 a month, in addition to the computer ($575), set-up and training and high-speed Internet charges; participants may use their own computer if it has a web cam and meets other specifications. (I was able to sit in on a class using my five-year-old Macbook laptop.)
Technology That Empowers
The Virtual Senior Center is one of many innovative ways that Selfhelp supports the well being of its clients. The organization was established some 80 years ago to assist Nazi holocaust survivors who came to the United States. Thirty years ago, the group expanded its services to low- and moderate-income older adults in New York City and Long Island.
“We believe in independent living with services, if and when [people] need them,” says CEO Stuart C. Kaplan, “so it creates dignity and independence for the individual and keeps the cost of care at a minimal level.” Selfhelp operates six senior centers (in addition to the virtual one), six housing complexes, four naturally occurring retirement communities (NORCs), an Alzheimer’s support program, home care, case management and other services.
In apartment complexes with Selfhelp, health kiosks in the lobbies let residents monitor their vital signs, which helps them better manage chronic conditions, such as high blood pressure.
Residents also use Skype to connect virtually with social workers, who stay on top of their emerging problems. “That contact is much better than a phone call — seeing somebody, how they’re dressed, what their demeanor is,” says Kaplan. Through this technology, residents may be visited weekly, rather than every two or three months.
Fundamental to Selfhelp’s philosophy is that older people need to stay connected to the wider world. “To that end, utilizing our technologies, we work with schools, museums, churches and synagogues and bring all those activities and age groups, to our seniors, if they cannot get there any other way.”
As for the Virtual Senior Center, Kaplan says, “The response has been absolutely remarkable.”


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