Embrace Your Inner Curmudgeon (or Termagant)

W.C. Fields was the consummate curmudgeon.

The late actor/comedian was typically cast as a bad-tempered, often-inebriated misanthrope who infamously disliked children and dogs. His entire schtick was playing a grouch — and not a lovable one. Among Fields' memorable expressions: "I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally" and "Start every day off with a smile and get it over with." And "I like children. If they're properly cooked."

It's appropriate, then, that we observe National Curmudgeons Day on Fields' birthday, Jan. 29.

But before you shrug off National Curmudgeons Day as just another fabricated "national day" to celebrate something for fun — Jan. 29 also commemorates corn chips and bubble wrap — take a few minutes to ponder what curmudgeons bring to the world. And which contrarian qualities you might consider embracing.

First, a primer on the much-maligned malcontent.

Definitions of curmudgeon vary widely from the straightforward, "an old person who is often in a bad mood," to the elaborate, "Old, cranky, and more than a little stubborn, a curmudgeon is the gruff, grey-haired neighbor who refuses to hand out candy at Halloween."

So curmudgeons are old and grumpy. And the general consensus is that curmudgeons are usually men.

Indeed, most of us can easily summon up a slew of classic male sourpusses: Ron Swanson ("Parks and Recreation") and Larry David ("Curb Your Enthusiasm"), Archie Bunker, Fred Flintstone — and pretty much any role played by Jerry Stiller or Ed Asner. And then there's Ebenezer Scrooge who could be the poster child for a curmudgeon.

Can a woman be a curmudgeon? Yes, we can! Although it's generally accepted that the female equivalent of curmudgeon is termagant (this SAT prep course thinks so anyway). Other interchangeable female curmudgeon monikers include harridan, old biddy, battle-axe, shrew, virago — the list goes on.

I first heard the word "termagant" during an episode of "Downton Abbey." The Dowager Countess of Grantham (played sublimely by Maggie Smith) used it in reference to another troublesome woman. The (extreme!) irony here is that the Countess is, herself, a termagant, "a harsh-tempered or overbearing woman."

Like her male counterpart W.C. Fields, the Dowager Countess is also exceedingly quotable: "No guest should be admitted without the date of their departure settled." "Machiavelli is frequently underrated. He had many qualities." "There's nothing simpler than avoiding people you don't like. Avoiding one's friends, that's the real test."

All of these antisocial bon mots are delivered with the Countess' trademark imperious comportment. In a contest of curmudgeonliness, she would give Fields a run for his money.

None of the definitions — for curmudgeons, termagants and the like — are what you'd call flattering. But like most things in life, curmudgeonliness is not a black or white proposition — neither all good nor all bad. No one believes it's advisable to go Extreme Curmudgeon and become a misanthropic hermit. But curmudgeons, it turns out, have some character traits that can serve us well.

Here's a look at those Ebenezer Scrooge attributes you should consider adopting:

1. The ability to question authority

Curmudgeons are contrarians. They have zero inhibitions around challenging their higher-ups. Indeed, it's their default M.O.

As a child of the '60s, educated in traditional Catholic schools, questioning authority was not an option. Whether you went to parochial or public schools, you may have experienced this "children should be seen and not heard" educational approach too. To say that it has not served me well is a gross understatement.

2. Skepticism (even cynicism)

All the world loves Pollyanna. But reflexively giving others the benefit of the doubt can be hazardous. And costly.

While a blanket approach of cynicism about everyone and everything is not a recipe for a good life, having an attitude of "now wait just a minute!" in some situations can come in very handy.

Take the ubiquitous scams out there — which disproportionately impact older adults. I have bright and educated (older) family and friends who have been taken in by bogus emails and phone calls, even door-to-door salespeople. Some have lost money; all have lost time and effort canceling credit cards, clawing back fraudulent charges — and a bit of their faith in humanity.

3. Critical thinking skills

This brings me to the ability to think critically, to objectively analyze and evaluate information to arrive at solid conclusions.

Here's the deal: it turns out that being a bellyaching grump may actually enhance your critical thinking skills. Researchers at the University of Arizona, partnering with scientists in The Netherlands, found that when people are in a negative mood, they are more careful and analytical.

Whodathunkit?

And — my oh my! — we need those critical thinking skills in today's world. Not accepting everything at face value—like the 104,250 reviews with a 4.6 average for this electric toothbrush on Amazon—may be one of the most important life skills we can hone at this juncture in our not-necessarily-factual-information-overload reality. (There are SO many other areas where we need to apply our critical thinking skills. I point out this one because my BS Meter shrieks when I encounter overwhelming — both in number and rating — reviews online.)

4. Counterculture proclivities

Curmudgeons are, essentially, counterculturists. Our society can be toxic — from negative peer pressure to (anti)social media to corporate hegemony — the messages we receive daily, hourly are rarely healthy and compassionate. Challenging the status quo in a pernicious environment is the rational thing to do.

5. Self-confidence (especially for women)

Women stand to gain more from reclaiming their latent termagant tendencies than men. That unflappable self-righteousness — a hallmark of the harridan — can translate to plain old self-confidence if used judiciously and kindly. And women lag behind men in this important quality.

The Dowager Countess of Grantham provides a good role model here. Self-confidence is her super power.

Ladies, let's seize our inner battle-axe!

6. Outspokenness

A classic curmudgeonly trait is speaking one's mind. Some may say curmudgeons have no filter, and that can certainly be a problem. But being comfortable with raising one's voice is not nothing. I have a magnet on my fridge that reads: "Speak your mind, even if your voice shakes!" I am in awe of folks who demonstrate this unflinching boldness.

There's a famous scene in the movie "Network" (1976) where the nightly news anchor (Howard Beale played by Peter Finch) goes way off script and rails against everything from inflation to pollution to crime to the Russians to just the insanity of existence. He tells listeners to go to their windows, throw them open and yell, "I'm mad as hell and I'm not going to take this anymore!"

And they do. Droves of people around the country create a din of anger and frustration.

There's still — nearly 50 years later (and perhaps always?) — a lot to be angry about: Wars, racism, misogyny, homelessness, mass shootings, the electoral college, threats to democracy everywhere.

Speaking — with a shaking voice — for myself, I'm inclined to channel my inner termagant/curmudgeon/Dowager Countess/Howard Beale this year.

I'm mad as hell and I'm not going to take it anymore. How about you?

Marie Sherlock practiced law for a decade before turning to writing and editing in her 30s — and never looked back. She's worked as the editor of several publications and is the author of a parenting book (Living Simply with Children; Three Rivers Press). She spends her empty-nest days writing about travel trends and destinations, simplicity, spirituality and social justice issues. Read More